God is a fantastic guy. Everyone imagines him differently, and he's cool with that. God was first recognized during World War II where he was a General, and led an assault in both Normandy and Japan. He has served in every war, and is the cool grandpa of religions. He's also a bit crazy, though, as sixty years of fighting in war will do that. He carries around a shiv and threatens to shank you if you joke about his heritage (He's a black Scotsmen with one eye and is fluent in Russian). He once had a son named Jesus who was also a party animal but God was the ultimate party animal and was afraid his son would overthrow him as presiadent of his college fraternity. So God killed his son before that could happen. In 1982, God was an alcoholic who had just been laid off from his job at the steel factory, so he picked up his old job as leader of the Universe. He is best friends with Russel Brandt and Derek Jeter. He is currently married to Jessica Alba with twenty-six babies, who are all black Scottish party animals who all have one eye.

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